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MG MGA NO, PLEASE! Not ANOTHER poem! BBS discussion at MG-Cars.net
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MG MGA - NO, PLEASE! Not ANOTHER poem!
| Hi again folks. Seems my creative? juices are flowing, and I'm dropping poems like puppies. So here is my most recent literary monsterpiece. Yes Steve, I know, sure go ahead. About those royalties?....... Enjoy the poem, Glenn MGA Tuneup My MGA is now running quite rough I can tell precisely when it’s not up to snuff. Gas mileage is really starting to drop Time for a tuneup, out I can’t cop Pull the plugs and check the gap Inspect the porcelain for any crap Plugs should be of colour light tan Replacing them, is now the best plan. Spark plugs are screwed in really tight, Jeeze Next time I better use compound, anti seize Be sure to use the correct plug gap code So to precisely bend the side electrode Check ignition cables for frays and cracking Don’t want high voltage arcing or mistracking Pull the distributor to install new points They sell new ones at auto part joints Set the contacts at inches point oh one five With this clearance the engine will thrive Wipe a smidgen of grease onto the distributor cam Nicely lubed, open and close, the points will slam Don’t forget to pull the distributor rotor And under it, put a drop of oil, motor Carefully check distributor cap If bad, another one on, do slap Ignition wires are clamped to distributor cap by screw Just rip them out and you will have to buy ones new Intake and exhaust clearances need to be set Currently way out of adjustment, I’d bet Insert into front bumper, the long slender shank of the solid steel, but seldom used, MG hand crank Turn handle clockwise to crank the mill When correct valve is up, be completely still Set each valve carefully, using “the rule of nine” Adjusting the tappets can be a real swine Trying to use driver, gauge, and wrench all at once Makes an incompetent angry, and feel like a dunce After adjustment, the lock nuts be sure to tighten Failure to do so, could the owner, easily frighten Take the car for a fast, extended run This is to warm up the engine, son Now to correctly adjust the SU pair Cause they need proper fuel and air Remove the dashpots, sitting on top Using solvent, remove all the glop From the dashpot’s aluminum inside Be meticulous, don’t let this chore slide Throttle shaft coupling need to be undone So that each carb of the set, can act as one Then remove all tension on the choke lever Carburettor adjustment before this, never Make sure the jets are exactly right on center The carburettor needle, be sure not to bend her Can’t adjust carbs while sitting at a bench Open toolbox and grab your SU wrench Counting flats, turn the jet nuts to and fro Continue on until you get proper gas flow Check correct mixture by lifting a pin Right or wrong you can tell by the din Next, carb balance you need to set With a unisyn that’s quite easy to get Got no unisyn? use a heater hose It’s the best alternative, I suppose Check one carb and then the other This ain’t so easy, is it brother? The carbs are now set to be running quite fair They are sucking just the right amount of air Clean air filters in gunk, to flush out the dirt Don’t splash grimy solvent onto your shirt Oil the filters, and shake them dry But reinstalling them doesn’t fly Cause some engineering dolt Made them difficult to re-bolt Tuneup is now completely done So drop the top, and have some fun. Written by Glenn Hedrich |
| Glenn |
| Hi folks. OOPS! I accidentally upload an unfinished version of my poem. Here is the proper (complete) poem. Sorry! Glenn MGA Tuneup My MGA is now running quite rough I can tell precisely when it’s not up to snuff. Gas mileage is really starting to drop Time for a tuneup, out I can’t cop Pull the plugs and check the gap Inspect the porcelain for any crap Plugs should be of colour light tan Replacing them, is now the best plan. Spark plugs are screwed in really tight, Jeeze Next time I better use compound, anti seize Be sure to use the correct plug gap code So to precisely bend the side electrode Check ignition cables for frays and cracking Don’t want high voltage arcing or mistracking Pull the distributor to install new points They sell new ones at auto part joints Set the contacts at inches point oh one five With this clearance the engine will thrive Wipe a smidgen of grease onto the distributor cam Nicely lubed, open and close, the points will slam Don’t forget to pull the distributor rotor And under it, put a drop of oil, motor Carefully check distributor cap If bad, another one on, do slap Ignition wires are clamped to distributor cap by screw Just rip them out and you will have to buy ones new Intake and exhaust clearances need to be set Currently way out of adjustment, I’d bet Insert into front bumper, the long slender shank of the solid steel, but seldom used, MG hand crank Turn handle clockwise to crank the mill When correct valve is up, be completely still Set each valve carefully, using “the rule of nine” Adjusting the tappets can be a real swine Trying to use driver, gauge, and wrench all at once Makes an incompetent angry, and feel like a dunce After adjustment, the lock nuts be sure to tighten Failure to do so, could the owner, easily frighten Crank engine to 7 degrees before top dead center A timing light unnecessary, don’t bother to rent her Just use a single bulbed test light To set up the ignition timing right Take the car for a fast, extended run This is to warm up the engine, son Now to correctly adjust the SU pair Cause they need proper fuel and air Remove the dashpots, sitting on top Using solvent, remove all the glop From the dashpot’s aluminum inside Be meticulous, don’t let this chore slide Throttle shaft coupling need to be undone So that each carb of the set, can act as one Then remove all tension on the choke lever Carburettor adjustment before this, never Make sure the jets are exactly right on center The carburettor needle, be sure not to bend her Can’t adjust carbs while sitting at a bench Open toolbox and grab your SU wrench Counting flats, turn the jet nuts to and fro Continue on until you get proper gas flow Check correct mixture by lifting a pin Right or wrong you can tell by the din Next, carb balance you need to set With a unisyn that’s quite easy to get Got no unisyn? use a heater hose It’s the best alternative, I suppose Check one carb and then the other This ain’t so easy, is it brother? The carbs are now set to be running quite fair They are sucking just the right amount of air Clean air filters in gunk, to flush out the dirt Don’t splash grimy solvent onto your shirt Oil the filters, and shake them dry But reinstalling them doesn’t fly Cause some engineering dolt Made them difficult to re-bolt Tuneup is now completely done So drop the top, and have some fun. Written by Glenn Hedrich |
| Glenn |
| You're going to end up with your own page on my site by the time Spring rolls around. |
| Steve Simmons |
| i think glenn is attempting to translate all his manuals into blank verse, might be nice to tune an engine with an unending string of rhyming couplets as instructions :) |
| Chris Edwards |
| "MGB Repair Manual for Doctor Suess Fans, by Glenn Hedrich" On sale now for $29.99 USD at Amazon.com |
| Steve Simmons |
| Hi Steve. Well, at least then I'd get SOME royalties! ;^( LOL Glenn |
| Glenn |
This thread was discussed on 26/11/2004
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